I get by with a little help from my friends x

We are friends because you get it. I’m not sure what that means (it’s all so vague) but whatever it is, you have it. I don’t need to explain anything to you or worry if you’ll get the joke. This means so much to me.  As I was chatting to my dad this weekend about life … as you do.  I said something to him and ended what I was saying with … “Does that make sense?”  He put his hand on my hand and asked me why I say that so much and everything I say makes perfect sense and I should never worry about sound stupid or being misunderstood.  That is often the way I feel and that is why I get anxious about talking to people who do not really know me.  It is due to my deafness and confidence that I feel this way and I could see that it broke my dad’s heart that I feel this way but he understood and told me never to change.  My real friends are the same … I absolutely LOVE my friends.  I always say that you can’t choose your family… but you can choose your friends.  


I love how those friends I feel comfortable with I can tell a joke or a funny story without the other person looking at me as if I am making no sense whatsoever.  In fact, they encourage me.  The very first person that brought out my real sense of humour is my amazing wife, Nat.  I feel I really can be me with her.  Apparently I have an real laugh that she had never heard me do before until we were together and it is something I do occasionally with her and she loves it!! (Phew)

I love that we are friends because you love me even when I’m terrible. It’s easy to love someone when they’re doing well, it’s easy when there’s nothing but happiness and good vibes. The real challenge comes when everything is crap. And I want to hide away from the world.  My friends continue to text me and send me pictures of things they think I will like just to say ‘hey we are thinking of you’ – that means so much to me.  You guys know who you are!

We are friends because you never make me uncomfortable. I think about some of my past friends (and some family members) and realise that they’ve made me feel weird at some point in our friendship / relationship. Whether it’s from an awkward silence or a snide remark, I’ve felt unsure about them. Not you though. I always know that you make sense and that this makes sense.

We are friends because we can go for long periods of time without talking and it won’t damage the relationship. We always pick up where we left off.  I LOVE LOVE THIS!!   Surfaces changes mean nothing to us. You could become a vegan who goes by a weird pop group and attends odd conventions, and I would still feel closer to you than anyone else. We don’t need common interests in order to connect. We don’t need a mutual love of music or sports or whatever to keep us together.  We just gel don’t we, and that feels good doesn’t it?

We are friends because you don’t get resentful or jealous if I get into a relationship (in my case, same sex relationship) or get into a good job. I mean, maybe you are and that’s fine. The important thing is we support each other and respect what we want from life…

You are my friend because you’re not afraid to listen to my crap or disagree with me. I can’t get away with anything when I’m with you. You’ll tell me things that I need to hear but everyone else is too afraid to tell me. Your honesty is so damn refreshing albeit a bitter pill to swallow sometimes.  But we need it don’t we.  How are we meant to make progress?
We are friends because you make feel less alone in this mad, flaky world. It’s amazing how often you can feel disconnected from people. It’s amazing how many people can betray you, or fail to understand the words that are coming out of your mouth. When I see you, it’s a burst of reassurance that I’m not the only who looks at the world this way. There’s someone else. And that someone is you.  

This is not dedicated to one friend only.  But to my close friends and my wife, mum and dad who know me so well.  I love you all.  

I GET BY WITH A LITTLE HELP FROM MY FRIENDS.

Thank you for reading this.  

Speak soon.  Love F x